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He couldn’t shake this feeling, crazy though it seemed, that he was falling in love with this girl. How could that be? How was it possible for him to feel so intensely for someone he had never met? Her letters never contained a return address, never a clue as to why they were being addressed to him. Every time he received one, John would write a response. He saved all of these letters, tied in a bundle. Together they painted a heart-wrenching portrait of star-crossed lovers, separated by physical distance as well as strange circumstances that limited their relationship to shared words and the exchange of written scenarios. John was due for leave at Christmas. As he packed his belongings, he instinctively grabbed the bundle of letters, now quite thick after almost a year of correspondence, knowing he would feel the need to read through them several times over the next few weeks, just to satisfy his cravings. He shook his head at himself and smiled wryly at this addiction to a woman he. We had to return and our dreams came to nothing as dreams do. I’ve told you this before, honey.’ ‘Not to a woman. You told me when I was too young to understand the truth.’ ‘Well… then things started to get worse, almost right away. He began to resent that his freedom was gone, that he couldn’t be the cock in the farmyard. As the son of an important man, he was used to chatting up girls and I wasn’t his first, so having to stay at home and care for me when I was pregnant was difficult for him. He tried,’ she sighed into the phone, ‘I think he tried, but some nights he made some excuse and came home drunk and I could smell the women on him. He didn’t really have a job, just ran errands for his father, but his father’s influence was declining because of age and probably politics. I think the wedding was the last opportunity he had to gather the respect he once had – like it was his retirement party or something. Well then, he had to find work, your father, and he didn’t do well in.
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